


The Perks of Hitting Rock Bottom

by veenaistired



Category: Long Gone Days (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Not Canon Compliant, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, kids in need of a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:15:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24682951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/veenaistired/pseuds/veenaistired
Summary: After what happened in Kiel, Rourke and Lynn have a talk. Crying won't make your problems go away, but hey, it helps.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 15





	The Perks of Hitting Rock Bottom

**Author's Note:**

> Ever since I finished chapter 3 I've had this stuck in my head. The found family dynamic of the cast really got to me, in the best possible way and these two deserve a little break. 
> 
> Anyway, hope you enjoy and thanks for reading <3

Rourke lay awake, tracing the cracks in the wall with his eyes as the others slept. He was absolutely exhausted. Bruised and hurt from the earlier beating, courtesy of Beqiri and his thugs. Bone-weary. And yet, he couldn't seem to fall asleep. Instead, he'd been staring at the damn ceiling for what felt like hours. Even though his eyelids were heavy and his body felt like a ton of rocks, he couldn't stop the events of the past few days from replaying in his mind, over and over again. Next to him, Adair slept peacefully. Rourke couldn't fathom how he did it. Adair somehow always managed to stay calm and if Rourke was being honest, he envied him for that. In truth, it seemed as if everyone else was taking what had happened in Kiel better than him. All of them were fast asleep. Except for Lynn.

She'd gotten up and left the room a while ago, without waking anyone. In all honesty, he was a bit worried about her. Ever since they'd left Aldebaran she'd acted a bit strange around him and Adair. Not suspicious or distrustful, just... different. Sure, she still seemed like her usual, spunky self, but then and there he'd caught glances of something else. He still didn't know what exactly had happened to the others at the casino, but it couldn't have been good, that much was for sure. Lynn was strong, he knew that. Hell, she was one of the strongest people he knew, and he'd known her for a grand total of four days. But, right now, he wouldn't have been surprised if she felt just as confused and scared as he did. 

Releasing a quiet sigh, he pushed himself up. He wasn't going to sleep anytime soon, so he figured he might as well check up on her. Trying to be as quiet as possible, he slowly made his way out of the room. Rourke didn't have to search long. He found her down the hallway, sitting on the floor. When she heard him approach, she turned her head towards him but didn't move. For an awful moment, he thought he'd made a mistake in coming here, but then she nodded once and patted the spot on the floor next to her with her hand. Reluctantly, he sat down. 

"Couldn't sleep either?" A shake of her head. Silence. "Hey... are you okay?" He stumbled over the words, clumsy, like a child. More silence. He wondered if he was making things worse, if he should just leave her alone and go back to, unsuccessfully, trying to sleep. Just as he was about to get up again and leave, her voice cut through the dark. 

"Rourke… What do you know about your mother?" He didn't know what he’d expected her to say, but that sure wasn’t it. 

He stayed silent for a moment, contemplating the question. He knew mothers were important to the people on the surface, but he’d never known his. He didn’t even know her name. All he’d ever been told about his family was that the general was everyone’s father and everyone else at the Core were siblings. Part of him wondered why Lynn would ask this at such a time, or ever really, but it seemed important to her. 

"I don’t know anything about her. We never met", he answered truthfully. 

"Oh." Was that disappointment in her voice? Resignation? She looked as if she was done with the conversation, but something in him needed to know what was going on, even if he had a bad feeling about this. 

"Lynn, what is this about?" She quickly looked away from him and down on her hands. For a second he thought he’d never get an answer, that she’d just leave, but then she in- and exhaled once, deeply, as if to prepare herself, and spoke.

"When we went to Aldebaran last night… It wasn’t the first time I’d been there." He had absolutely no idea how that was in any way connected to his mother, but she sounded uncertain, almost afraid, so he didn’t dare ask. "Before coming to Kaliningrad I stayed in Kiel for a while. I was looking for work and went to the casino for a job interview and, well… turned out it was a trap. Instead of hiring me, Beqiri kept me captive there. I was locked up in this room with a bunch of other women for, god, I don’t even know how long. One of his underlings took pity on us though, and let us go." He sucked in a gasp of air and snapped his head around to face her, but before he could even get started, she dismissed him with a wave of her hand, still not looking him in the face. 

"Don’t say anything, just let me finish. So, when we went back to Aldebaran Beqiri recognized me. And told me that… he was going to sell me to the Core. As a mother. Apparently, they pay a lot for that."

Rourke’s eyes widened and he went completely still. Something thick and heavy settled in his stomach. Guilt. Disgust. Anger. He felt almost sick with it. Lynn still wasn’t looking at him, her bangs partially obscuring her face as she stared down at her hands, folded in her lap. He could tell how upset she was, despite her trying not to let it show. He had to do something, say something, even if he didn’t have the slightest idea what. The passing seconds stretched into what felt like hours and when Rourke finally spoke, it was a wonder his voice didn’t crack.

"Lynn, I- I don’t know what to say." It wasn’t at all helpful or reassuring, but better than that damned silence. Still, the guilt for being part of this, even if he hadn’t known, kept gnawing at him and an apology was already forming in his mind. "I’m-"

"Don’t apologize", Lynn cut him off before he could finish. She was looking at him now, her eyes slightly glassy, but no hint of accusation in them. He couldn’t bring himself to look away. "It’s obvious that you didn’t know about the mothers." 

How in the world had _she_ ended up comforting _him_? Lynn looked as if she was on the verge of crying and there he was, unable to do anything. Still unsure what to say he gently put a hand on her arm, letting the words come to him.

"During my last day before leaving the Core, I found this strange room. It was full of… incubators." He felt her stiffen beneath his hand but didn't stop. It wasn't going to be what she wanted to hear, maybe not even what she needed to hear, but Lynn deserved the truth. And he deserved to get rid of the weight of another awful secret. "Now I’m sure that’s where they create new soldiers for the Core, but I should’ve known earlier. I shouldn’t have been so blind."

"So, If none of the women who were taken were actually around, does that mean…" Her voice was trembling with anxiety and by now she definitely looked close to tears. Lynn wasn’t stupid, of course she’d figured it out. The truth was painful and terrifying, but he didn’t want to insult her by lying. 

"I doubt the Core would just let them go after they’d gotten what they needed. Loose ends and all that." 

She looked straight at him again, slowly nodding once. She'd opened her mouth as if to say something, but nothing came out. Instead, a single tear rolled down her cheek. And then another, and another until she was crying. Rourke hadn't the slightest idea how to deal with this, but something told him that nothing he could say would help right now. So he kept his mouth shut and, instead of spouting something that would undoubtedly make the whole thing worse, pulled her into an embrace. She didn't resist or pull away. Instead, she buried her head in his shoulder and let the tears flow freely. He could feel them dampen his shirt and every so often her body shook through a silent sob. And then, from one second to the next, it felt as if a switch had been flipped inside him. 

The past few days had been madness. He’d shot and killed civilians. He’d been branded a traitor by the only family he’d ever known. He’d witnessed the destruction of an innocent community, unable to stop it. He’d found out his entire life had been a lie. And yet, Rourke hadn’t cried. But for some reason, this, Lynn's confession and the realization that even his mother had been just another victim of the Core was enough to break him. The situation, in it’s messy, bloody, terrifying entirety, came crashing down on him in full force, and all of a sudden he couldn’t stop the tears from spilling from his own eyes. 

Lynn noticed but didn’t break away or say anything. Instead, she just held onto him a little tighter as if trying to tell him that it was alright. For a long while, they just sat there, crying and sobbing like little children. It was absolutely terrible and painful in a way that had nothing to do with the wounds of the battlefield. It was also more relieving than he ever could’ve imagined. 

In the end, Lynn calmed down a good while before him but didn’t pull away. Instead, she let him cry until he was finished. Rourke was so thankful for it, he didn’t know if he’d ever be able to put it into words. Turned out, he didn’t have to. As soon as they broke their embrace, she looked at him, eyes red-rimmed and poofy, but with the tiniest of smiles on her lips. 

"Look at us, crying like babies." Despite it all, there was a tinge of humor in her voice. Her lightheartedness turned out to be contagious and he couldn’t help but return the smile.

"Thank you. I didn’t know how much needed this." The words felt inadequate, but they were all he had. Besides, Lynn didn't seem to mind. 

"Yeah, same here." Despite everything, she looked relieved. 

"Still, are you okay? I feel kind of bad for pushing you into telling me about all this." Lynn just scoffed. He admired the way she could go from serious to playful in an instance, making even god-awful situations seem less scary. If he, against all odds, managed to live through all this, would he be able to one day do the same?

"Don’t worry about it. I would’ve had to tell you sooner or later. Everyone except you and Adair was there when we confronted Beqiri, so they all know."

"Just because everyone else knew didn't mean you had to tell me. Not if it was hurting you." 

"I know. But it would’ve felt wrong leaving you in the dark. Besides, I trust you."

The words hit him like a punch to the face. Lynn trusted him. He'd lied to her face. Had been part of the very organization that had ruined her life not once, but twice. And she _trusted_ him. A warmth spread through his chest and even though everything he'd ever known had been ripped away from him, he found that not all was lost. His brain frantically searched for an adequate response, to no avail. Once again, Lynn took over when he didn't know what to say. She simply flashed him another smile, as if she already knew what he was thinking, and maybe she did. A smile that said more than anything he could've choked out. They sat in comfortable silence for a good while, before she spoke up again.

"Can you do me a favor?" 

"Of course."

"Adair deserves to know about this. Do you mind being there when I tell him?" 

"Not at all." All of a sudden she looked as if an invisible weight had been lifted from her shoulders. As strange as it was, he felt stronger for it, less insecure. As if helping people was what he'd been meant to do in the first place. 

"Thanks. You’re a real friend Rourke, you know that?"

He couldn't help the smile that came across his face at her words. He didn't want to. And, miraculously, for the first time that night, he knew exactly what to say. 

"Right back at you."


End file.
